Monday, October 06, 2014

11 Ways to Skin a Cat


Sphynx Cat 
Obviously the skinning of cats has become a “lost art” so here are some suggestions… 11 in fact… of how to skin a cat…

And if you are wondering where the saying “more than one way to skin a cat” came from, you will have to research 17th Century British english sayings… and mostly the saying means that there are more than one solution to any problem.

So, lets get started on 11 ways to skin a cat:

1. With a sharp instrument like a knife, shard of glass, teeth or a small explosive if you want to achieve tasks quickly.

2. Use powerful vacuum cleaner and suck cats insides out, leaving just the skin.

3. Simply click your heels three times and say “there is no cat like a skinned cat” and if that does work, tie one end of string to a doorknob, the other end to the cat’s skin and slam the door.

4. invite the cat to play strip poker and cheat

5. Convince the cat that “all cool cats are getting skinned” and help the cat remove its skin.

6. Sneak up behind the cat, and clap very big cymbals, therefore scaring the cat “out of his skin.”

7. Get instructions from the nursery rhyme “Three Little Pigs” and then huff and puff and blow the cat’s skin off.

8. Get a very sharp samurai sword and slice the cat’s skin off.

9. Tell the cat that the current craze is for cats to get tattoos but the cat needs to shed its fur so you can see the tattoo.

10. Wait for a very hot day and invite the cat to play strip poker. Then I suggest you cheat because cats are very smart.  

11. Search Google images for furless cats, and print off hundreds of pictures of furless cats therefore shaming the cat into shedding its fur.

If none of these techniques work, get a dog.

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